There’s a difference between wanting to spend time with the guy you’re dating, and demanding you spend all your free time together.If your dude wants to go out with his friends, or spend the afternoon alone, let him—and don’t call and text 100 times, either. Plus, some say that men are wired differently in the sense that women often tend to fall in love with a man because they’re spending time spending time with you.EDITOR' S NOTE: He Said-She Said is a biweekly advice column for singles featuring a question from a reader with responses from a male and female point of view.If you've got a question about anything related to singleness or living the single life, please submit it to [email protected] (selected questions will be posted anonymously).Are you willing to settle for a guy who never asks how you are, is unsatisfying in bed, refuses to look out for your well-being, or goes off the grid for days because he’s a tall, handsome investment banker? This is different than having high standards in that being shallow means you’re willing to give certain guys the time of day if they can offer you something in exchange.And we’re not talking about unconditional love and support.This one might be tough to hear, but if you don’t make a solid impression on a first date, you’re not getting asked on a second. Think about it: Would want to go out with a guy again who didn’t put his phone down, only gave you one-word answers, didn’t make eye contact, got blackout drunk, revealed too much too soon, only talked about his ex, didn’t offer to pay for anything, or sent you a text message right after that date along the lines of “OMG so I know I only left you a few minutes ago, but I had the best time EVR, ur sooooo amaze and I can’t wait to see u again. This means, asking light questions about his job, his hobbies, his friends, and pop culture.
“People often think having high standards means being picky, but it really means being discriminating.
Likewise, stay away from phrases like “I’m obsessed with my cat.” (Hear that sound?
It’s the multitudes of men clicking the backspace arrow) or “I’m totally type-A, and I’m okay with that.”Translation: I’m totally controlling, and won’t ever change.
Big, who can change a tire with his bare hands but can also rival Jacques Pepin in the kitchen, who loves drinking beer at dive bars but who’s a certified sommelier who owns his own vineyard, who also happens to be—? Even if your expectations aren’t quite as overblown, odds are you’ve scoffed at a man because he’s not tall enough, you don’t like the sound of his job, or you’re afraid your friends will think he’s a loser.
That’s called being picky, and it’s why you’re still single.